Friday, 10 August 2007

Don't You Wish You're Girlfriend Was Hot Like Me?


Someone chopped Denis Wise's balls off. At least so he claims.

Responding to the vote which upheld the FA's decision to give them 15 penalty points he said:

"It's laughable. Not only have they taken my arms and legs off, now they've cut my balls off as well."

A number of comments spring to mind but some things are best left unsaid don't you think?

I'm just relieved I did not inadvertently select Leeds to support in those early days when I was choosing a team. What a narrow escape.

If I had done I would not have discovered just how hot it is to wear a Leicester City shirt out and about. Like yesterday.

There I was walking around the local town wearing my new shirt.

"Beep beep!"

I looked around and some bloke stopped his car and seemed to be signalling to me. I looked to see if I knew him and he shouted something. I looked again and he pointed to his shirt, pointed to me and put his thumb up. I concluded that either he was expressing some sort of approval for my chest (quite likely) or indicating that he was a Leicester City fan (very likely). I smiled and put my thumb up back in a cool, sort of "f**k I don't believe it, sort of way.

Shortly afterwards I was shopping in Waitrose (I try to avoid Tescos as that is where Leeds fans probably shop) when this other bloke said;

"I don't believe it. A Leicester City fan. In the middle of Waitrose in the middle of this town. And this season's shirt too!"

I found out his name is Jim Atkinson and he is something of a lapsed Foxes fan. I reassured him that we are on the up and encouraged him to return to the fold. Told him we had made some great buys including DJ Campbell and Stephen Clements. If you're reading this Jim - get your shirt and car sticker ordered today!

When we had finished the conversation and moved on my lover said "You blagged that well". Cheeky s*d!

So my advice girls - don those shirts and get out there and strut!


3 comments:

  1. Actually, as it goes, I reckon the best thing to lay under Topps Tiles is a terrific set of tits.

    You win one nil

    JVIP

    ReplyDelete
  2. It was all looking so good until you spelt 'Clemence' wrong ;)

    ReplyDelete