Football Karma Sutra

I thought it was about time I got to grips with the various positions on the football field. I have put it off long enough on the basis it seems rather boring.

Anyway, we have looked at goalkeepers before so I don't intend to go into detail about them. They have had more than enough attention already.

So what else have I learnt?

Well, centre forwards, also called strikers, are the main goal scorers. According to my source, "Scoring goals is beautiful, but being a striker means you may take a bit of a battering from opposition defenders - particularly if you're any good.". The source goes on to say, "... most of the top strikers in the world are selfish in front of goal - and their finishing skills are deadly.

Sometimes one centre forward tucks themselves behind the main striker and is given "licence to roam". Again my very reliable source tells me; "It is very difficult to mark this player because they can be playing quite deep one minute and then burst forward to link up with their striker."

Then there are the wingers or wide mid-fielders. Apparently this " is a varied and hardworking job .... not just about showing off a few tricks and letting the defenders clean up behind you."

Centre midfield players are described as " the orchestra conductors, the engines of the team, the players pulling the strings from the middle."

The wingbacks play a sort of attacking defence and are, I am told "a wonderful sight in the game is seeing the wing-back fly up and down the touchline terrorising the opposition."

And last but not least there are full backs, and as I always say "There is no better feeling than a sliding block, or chasing after a striker and nicking the ball off their toes."

Incidentally, my attention was awakened when I read about the Sweeper (on the basis that it sounds much like the Seeker position from Quidditch). More common on the continent apparently this player acts as an additional defender in front of the goal. Sadly though "no broomsticks required to be a good sweeper, just a good set of eyes, a fine footballing brain and two good feet."

So there you have it. The sort of Karma Sutra of football.