Saturday, 31 March 2007

Baying For Blood

What I actually meant was 2 - 1 at half time. And of course I was right. Sadly 4 -2 at full time.

I managed to listen to some of it through devious means, although to be honest it was hard to follow the commentary, especially as I didn't know who was who. I did hear enough to know that without exception everyone seemed to think The Foxes had not performed well. Especially the defenders.

And the fans on the message board are baying for blood. They are baying for Rob Kelly's blood. They are mad with the players. And they are shouting for Milan to do something.

I read another post today - on myspace. Someone called Damien. He says Leicester City fans are the loudest. They seem quite loud at the moment.

As for me well I have to confess to feeling a bit sad. Even though I expected us to lose.

What is happening to me?

Friday, 30 March 2007

Civil War

Blimey! The boys are fighting amongst themselves! See the comments on my post From Factories To Foxes on 26th March.

Of course, I am assuming they are boys. They don't actually say so. But call it an educated guess.

Don't mind me boys. You just carry on amongst yourselves. I have work to do. Quite a lot of it it would seem as I can't make much sense of what either of them are saying and I certainly have no idea which, if any, of what they say is true.

I don't care though if I am honest. Which doesn't necessarily make me a bad person.

But it does seem to suggest that there is a lot more to 'doing' football' than just finding out about the game and the people that play it. Apparently you have to have a view on all the politics of it. The sociological importance. The political angles.

And there I am - I don't even know who plays for my team. I really should think about finding out because they play their first match tomorrow (that is first since I became their fan which is obviously a milestone in their history even though they are not aware of this yet). Against Stoke City. Away. (Revision tip - this means The Foxes are playing at Stoke's ground).

I expect you are hoping I am going to make a prediction about the score. I don't intend to disappoint you.

I have researched the matter carefully. Looked at the message boards to see what the "well educated in doing football" have to say. And then I tossed a coin and I can tell you the score will be 2 -1 to Stoke.

You wait and see. I will be right.

Thursday, 29 March 2007

You Naughty Naughty Boys

The England football team were playing a match last night. They were playing against Andorra I think or somewhere like that. Anyway this team had only one professional player according to what I heard.

I listened to the match (or bits of it) on the radio. This was for two reasons:
  • I can easily do other stuff at the same time and tune it out if it gets boring
  • I don't have a TV
My impressions? Well the commentators (there were 3 of them) repeated themselves a lot - and I mean a lot. If they had said "They've got to get in there and open them up" one more time I had pledged myself to run naked around the block. Most striking though was that the English fans booed their team. Shouted stuff about the manager Steve McClaren (who'd be a football manager eh?).

Today those naughty booing boys have been roundly told off by the FA according to the news bulletin I just heard. A post on their website apparently. It's like school. Getting called to assembly because some boys (and it is always boys of course) have misbehaved and so there must be a public telling off.

I don't recall such action having a profound affect then. Hard to imagine it will now. But just in case anyone is listening, in the spirit of upholding pro-social behaviour (can't you just tell I used to be a Probation Officer) - YOU ARE VERY NAUGHTY BOYS!!!

That'll learn 'em.

Wednesday, 28 March 2007

Blame It On The Blag

I've just been reading back over my last few posts. Decided it is time for a bit of a reality check. Here am I, the girl who doesn't do football, in fact doesn't even like it, writing posts about whether a football manager will keep his job. Like I know what I am talking about.

Mind you I reckon there is an element of blag to 'doing' football. And as I said in an earlier post, part of it is having an opinion about everything. I have seen nothing that indicates this has to be based upon any sort of evidence. And no-one ever seems to ask you to back it up.

For example, when I read stuff on the message boards I observe one fan come in and say they hate a particular player. Lots of other fans then join in, agreeing or disagreeing. At no point does anyone say why they like or dislike this poor person, other than to suggest they indulge in occasional caber throwing (work it out!).

So it would seem that I have learnt my first lesson about 'doing' football. You just blag your way through and no-one notices because they are all doing it too.

Or maybe you disagree???

Tuesday, 27 March 2007

Dog Eat Dog World

BBC Radio Leicester has a weekly programme devoted to LCFC - 6pm on a Monday. I have just listened to a recording of Milan Mandaric on the show a few weeks ago which was pretty interesting. He had some interesting things to say about why he chose Leicester. I liked his style - understated and yet you do get a sense of his passion beneath it all. I especially liked that he gave the loyalty of the fans as one of his key reasons for coming to Leicester. Whilst that is the sort of thing you would expect someone in that situation to say he did actually sound genuine.

When asked if Rob Kelly will is 'safe' in his position, he made it clear that he will be judged on results. "He deserves a chance". Mr Kelly - you have been warned!

I like him.

Meantime there are other things going on in the football world today. Steve McClaren the England coach is fighting for his career with fans and the media baying for his blood after a lack lustre performance on Saturday. The England Captain John Terry has felt it necessary to make a public declaration that the whole team to a man is behind their coach. Methinks thou protesteth too much! Like Mr Mandaric says - being nice is all very well but it is results that count.

Its a dog eat dog world!

Monday, 26 March 2007

From Factories To Foxes

Before I talk about Milan Mandaric I want to update you on the response to the post I left on Talking Balls, which has been fantastic. Replies have included;
  • lots of warm welcoming messages
  • helpful advice
  • some suspicion that it is all a big wind up
  • an offer of a shag
Lots of the fans have viewed the blog too - 246 hits yesterday. So thanks to all of you for taking the time to visit.

Now then - our Milan. Born in Yugoslavia and brought up in Serbia, he moved to America when his own government took a dislike to his capitalist ways following considerable business success. He repeated this success in America and gained a track record of developing highly successful businesses.

Eventually he moved into the world of sport to pursue his childhood love of football, first in America then Belgium. After that he took over Portsmouth FC (practise before the 'real' thing with LCFC) and under his leadership they rose from the Championship to the Premiership.

After a wobbly negotiation period he eventually took over at Leicester on 13th February 2007. Since then performance has been disappointing and as previously reported the general feeling is that significant changes are likely to come sooner rather than later.

Being a woman I trust my intuition. What my intuition says is that this man is going to be good for Leicester.

The Foxes are on the up!

Sunday, 25 March 2007

Talking Balls

How exciting. I have had a couple of replies already. If you read the previous post and look at the comments you will see we have a new visitor. His name is McFox and it would seem he is a Leicester City fan too. He seems nice enough if a little confused. He does have a good blog with some great videos of magic moments from bygone matches. There is a particularly entertaining one from 1934. You don't even have to like football to enjoy the commentary.

The other reply was from someone called Chappyblue who suggested a better message board site to find out about the club and what fans think. The site is called Talking Balls and is rocking. What is obvious from even the first glance is that Rob Kelly's accusations that recent performance problems are down to the players is not shared with many of the fans (and they should know for goodness sake). There is much talk of Mr Kelly's successor and even a vote going on. Favourite at the moment is Kevin Keegan.

I remember when I were a lass Kevin Keegan was THE football pinup. He was such a dude and that curly permed hair. Oh yes!

Either way it seems the fans think that change is in the wind. The club has recently been taken over by a man called Milan Mandaric and the general feeling is he won't suffer fools gladly and will do what is necessary to get the club into the Premiership.

More about Mr Mandaric next time

Saturday, 24 March 2007

Finger Pointing

This business of who is to blame for some inconsistent performances this season is not as simple as you might think. The manager, Rob Kelly, blames the players. My guess is that Mr Kelly has to take some responsibility but then what do I know?

Hey guess what. Good news. Leicester have a girls team. How fab is that! Read all about them here.

Oh and I have put that post on a couple of the fans sites as promised. This is what I wrote:

I'm new to LCFC and in fact new to football believe it or not. It's a long story but my lover reckons girls can't do football (he is a Reading supporter so what would he know!). So I have decided to prove him wrong.
After a careful selection process I decided LCFC is the team for me.
So any suggestions (preferably clean!!) about how to find out more about the team would be fab. This will help me with my blog, which is aimed at girls that cant 'do' football but should hopefully provide a few laughs for the boys too!

I will let you know if I get any replies.

Friday, 23 March 2007

Stand By Your Men

17 out of 24. 7 from the bottom of the Championship. Apparently that is not brilliant. In fact, according to one news source, the fans are getting a bit grumpy about the performance of our team. We have had 2 losses and a draw in the last 3 games, despite signing up four new players.

It would seem that whilst we had a period of being all bright eyed and bushy tailed, things have not gone as well as hoped and there is concern we could be RELEGATED! Being relegated is shameful.

This same news source asks us to stand by our team to keep them going. So that is what I shall do. I really must send that email. I am sure it will lift their spirits to know they have a new fan. Perhaps I will time it for just before their next game against Stoke City on 31st March.

So who is to blame for this poor performance? Find out in the next post.

Tuesday, 20 March 2007

They Always Smell Their Own Lair


It could only be one team. As I look back through all my careful research and evaluation I can see this. Good sense of colour. And well foxy. Like me.

Come on you Foxes!

Yep - I am now officially a Leicester City fan. Well when I say officially I mean that this is a public announcement and so I can't go back on it now. Although of course not many people will know yet. Because I haven't got that many readers. Which is probably a good thing because if I had and they knew me they might start talking to me about how we are doing in the league and who our manager is and what do I think of such and such a player. Hard to blag some of those basics. Not quite ready for that yet.

Mind you I do feel quite excited about being part of a new community. All those Leicester supporters who will want to be my friend now. I am thinking of emailing the fan site. You know say hello to everyone and tell them how excited I am to be joining them. It's an important communication though and not to be rushed. If I got it wrong they might think I was a bit weird or something. Imagine!

I will start drafting it tonight and let you know when it is ready.

Next post will consider the current state of affairs in terms of how Leicester are performing this season (who said I couldn't blag?)

Monday, 19 March 2007

Rum Ti Tum Ti Tum

So then - to consider the autobiographical and/or geographical connection to these teams.

Portsmouth - well I did once cop off with a sailor. That's about it though. I can't think of any other connection
Reading - the team my lover supports. Definitely in with a chance on that basis. Mind you it would limit the scope for (friendly of course!) rivalry. And the only time I have stayed in Reading I was very sick from food poisoning. Not the happiest of memories.
Plymouth Argyle - I saw my daughter dance in a competition in Plymouth once. She was fab. And my step daughter went to Plymouth Uni (though based in Exmouth). Nevertheless I do have a positive connection so this one is in with a chance.
West Ham - um well as a vegetarian I would struggle to support a team with meat in it's title
Watford - a mad boy from Watford pursued me once. And I have always liked the thought of the Watford gap though never fallen down it.
Sheffield United- I'm not allowed sharp things so given their affinity with knives and other things sharp perhaps not
Ipswich - a place I never been nor ever want to
Leicester - quite a few of my family members on my Dad's side come from Leicester. And the cheese is OK
Stoke - like the slight sexual undertones of the name. My aunty lives near there and I went clubbing with my cousin once in Stoke.
And finally....
Hull - makes me thinks of boats. My parents had a boat and I have some nice holidays on that. Otherwise no connection

So taking account of the above and all my other research who will it be?........

Cue drum roll

Find out next post

Saturday, 17 March 2007

In The Eye Of The Beholder

I have discovered that not only do English football clubs have different outfits to identify them but also emblems and nicknames. I think the latter are additional criteria I should take into account. I intend to reduce the initial pool to about 10 based upon the 'look' of the team as defined by these three aspects.

Of course just to complicate matters they wear different clothes when they play in their own ground (called imaginatively 'at home') to when they are in someone else's (called just as imaginatively 'away'). For the purposes of this exercise I will use the home strips, taking account of the away colour only in the event of a tie.

I have to say there is a bit of a lack of imagination going on when you start looking with regard to colours. I mean come on boys there are more colours in the rainbow than red or blue. In fact I have been so disappointed that I have decided to amend my criteria to include the whole of the Championship rather than just the top 10. That is probably fairer anyway as teams move up and down all the time.

So then my shortlist in no particular order:

Portsmouth: More creative than most in the use of blue and white. I like the way their away colours are a reverse of their home strip. Lovely symmetry. Although I have to say the red socks are a bit dodge. Their nickname is Pompey which reminds me of a carry on film and their badge is a pretty star and moon

Reading: Their strip looks like a convict's outfit so they get in because I used to work for the Probation Service. Being a Republican not keen on the nickname "The Royals" though. Also not so keen on the red and yellow away strip.

Plymouth Argyle: They wear green with all the environmentally friendly connotations, and indeed their nickname is - guess what - The Greens. Best of all though they have nicked the Blue Peter badge for their motif. Won it in a phone in apparently.

West Ham: Well they do at least have a bit of design going on with their burgundy and blue. I especially like that the sleeves are different to each other. Their motif has a slightly fairytale quality with the castle which appeals too.

Watford: Mmm - they have made the effort to be bold with their colours in their strip and their badge. Hard to know why they are called the hornets but sport a picture of a large moose on their badge though

Sheffield United: Their stripy strip reminds me of Spangles. The knife wielding badge reflects their nickname of The Blades which is a pretty cool name. Just a general feel of sparkliness really

Ipswich: Probably seems a strange choice at first sight with their plain blue shirt and grey shorts. It is the grey shorts that appeal on the basis that all things white become grey when I wash them and I can't help wondering if the strip was chosen by a pragmatist. Their badge shows a horse playing football and they are called the tractor boys which leads me to think they are either having a joke or they just don't get it. Either way they get in for entertainment value

Leicester: I like how they have used thin white stripes and their away strip is quite funky. Best of all though I like their badge and nickname - The Foxes. Being a bit of a fox myself I can relate to this

Stoke City: Strip is pretty mundane but they are called The Potters. How could a JKR fan not include them

Hull: Because they look like liquorice allsorts and/or tigers and have a badge and nickname to match (tigers not allsorts). A nicely co-ordinated image

Next post I will consider any geographical or autobiographical links I have with these teams, changing names if necessary to protect the innocent

Thursday, 15 March 2007

League Of Gentlemen

The first question is - girls football or boys football?

Now that's a dilemma.

Reasons for girls football are:
  • sisterhood
  • will quickly know more than most men on the subject
  • scribbler says some of them are good to watch
Reasons against girls football are:
  • won't provide me with good conversation on the subject with most other interested parties
  • when people say 'doing football' what they mean is boys football
  • it is our national game (spits in disgust)
Of course I could do both but if boys are to believed (which has yet to be proven) then there will be more than enough to find out about boys football alone. So for now I will swallow my girlie pride and merely keep a watching brief on the girls side of things.

So then, first step is to find out which teams are in the top 30. Let me share the outcome of my research on this subject.

There is a ranking system called Leagues. It is also known as the Football Pyramid. The best is called The Premiership (also known as the Barclay's Premiership after its sponsor). Then comes the Football League Championship (aka Coca-Cola Championship) League One (aka Coca Cola League One), then League Two (you've guessed it Coca Cola League Two). Below that is the Conference League and then various leagues below that. Players move between the leagues depending upon performance, thus all the different leagues are interconnected.

So I want to choose from all the teams in the Premiership(which has about 20 teams) and the top 10 or so in the Championship.

Wonder why the titles are that way around. Premiership reminds me of Prime Ministers and I don't think I would count them above Champions. No doubt this is one of football's many many mysteries I can only hope, with fingers firmly crossed, that I come to understand.

Next post - what do they wear?

Wednesday, 14 March 2007

Over The Top

Well this feels exciting. Poised on the edge of plunging into a euphoria of passion, loyalty, partisan commitment and kinsmanship.

Except I don't feel the pull. I am just standing here on the cliff top with no desire to jump. The call of the deep simply isn't calling. Maybe an expectation that the only route is the road to Damascus is unrealistic. Perhaps I am actually going to have to make a bit of effort - do some work. Create my own pathway.

I have observed people's reasons for selecting a team seem to be fairly varied and not always apparently logical. Supporting a team 'cos your dad did or because your mates do seems a bit feeble to me. Get a mind of your own I say. Plus what if like me your dad doesn't support a team?

Supporting a local team seems to have some merit. But then what if they are crap? Would I want to be associated with something second rate? I think not. I am a quality girl after all. Should I select a team on the basis that their star is currently high, knowing that there is only one way they can go - i.e.down? Do I seek a lowly team with potential and enjoy watching their ascension into football stardom? But if I judged their potential wrong and they remained lowly, I might be a laughing stock. Imagine! Ooh I shudder at the thought.

I have had a thought. It's a bit - well - contentious. A bit girlie. Could feed into some stereotypes about girls. But really it probably is quite important. The question is what colours do they wear? What is their strip? Could I for example be seen to support a team whose colours are as lifeless as black and white? I think not.

It's no good to just keep asking questions of course. I am going to have to tackle this one (Note to readers - observe how the use of football language can subtly enhance discussion of the topic. Its a clever device worth learning. Beware of being too obvious with it though). So I am off to do some research. My key criteria to select a team to support will be:
  • A team that is within the top 30 in the country
  • A team that sports a strip I like (note another clever use of 'in' language)
  • A team that I can claim some sort of geographical or autobiographical connection with
I'll post again soon and let you know how I am getting on.

Monday, 12 March 2007

Four Steps To Heaven

I like a challenge. Always have. Tell me I can't do something and it makes we want to do it. Except when I don't think I can do it, in which case I won't bother. Hard to know where this trait comes from. Nature or Nurture? Who am I proving something to? Myself? The World?

Anyway that's enough of deep and meaningful. Hardly a state one would expect the subject of football to evoke. So where does developing a love of football fit in the "challenges worth pursing" spectrum? Well I have to say there is some ambivalence here. Not because I doubt that I can do it although I do. More because I have such a high dislike of it (yeah well girls can't park properly - remember!). Yet I can't give up now so there is clearly some driving force. Guess I'll just have to run with it for now.

There is probably only one way to do this. It's going to involve me thinking about men for a bit. Not the worst of activities it has to be said. But specifically with regard to their relationships with football.

First thing I notice is that all the ones that are mad about football support a team. Even some of the ones that aren't mad about it. So I need to find a team to support. Next thing is that they all talk about the various big games that have been played, even if they are no relevance to their team. So I need to find out about games being played by the better teams. Another thing is they not only like to give a running commentry of the game they saw, interspersed with comments about how unlucky the team they favoured were and how the referee was a bastard. They also give a commentry on the commentry. They know all the commentators names. Never have a kind word to say about any of them. So I have to learn to have a view on every move and every decision. Finally you have to have an opinion - about everything. Everything to do with football. From whether the new England strip makes them all look like nancy boys and will never catch on to whether the 2422 formation is best. From whether that tackle was really dirty to whether girls can understand the offside rule. So I have to form an opinion - about everything.

Keeping up? Lets recap:

STEP 1: Get a team to support
STEP 2: Find out about important games being played and that have been played so that I can talk about them
STEP 3: Study moves and decisions and form a view
STEP 4: Get an opinion - about everything.

That shouldn't be too hard should it?

Next post will be about how to select a team.

Sunday, 11 March 2007

Why I Hate Football

I trained as a Social Worker. When you train as a Social Worker one of the things they do is enourage you to "park" your "issues". They often have a special piece of Flip Chart Paper just for this purpose. Participants are encouraged to "park" their 'issues" by writing them up on the paper. For everyone to see.

Social Workers have a lot of "issues". Funny thing though I never saw many of them "parked". I certainly never did it. I didn't have any issues - not that I was willing to share with the world anyway.

This post, however, is for just that purpose. It is where I am going to "park" all the things I hate about football. And there are quite a lot of them.

Please excuse me a moment while I become that Social Work student again.

Right. So the reasons I hate football are as follows:
  • I went to a predominently boys' school between the ages of 7 and 11. They played football. I walked up and down the sideline with a flag. It rained. I walked up and down the sideline with a flag. It was cold and windy. I walked up and down the line with the flag. And when something happened I was supposed to be watching. Only I wasn't because it was boring.
  • My first boyfriend used to take me to football matches. There were some things I liked.The singing. And some of the chanting was funny. And some was racist and offensive. And some was aggressive and threatening violence. It was at once exciting and frightening. But it was also boring quite a lot too.
  • It is always on the television. People I don't know. Teams I don't know. Just running about. And they are all men.
  • It is a male dominated game. They tell me it is our national game. My national game. Says who? Where was I when that vote was taking place? Must have nipped out to the loo because I don't remember that debate. And how can we have a national game that represents less than half the population? And lots of blokes don't like it either. My dad for one.
  • I thought the roots of football were in the local. I thought it was supposed to be a way of communities coming together to defeat others in fun. How come players get bought and sold and moved about? And why do people support clubs they live nowhere near and never have? And how come they act all loyal as if it was their own community. It is a complete conumdrum.
  • The whole thing gets used by men to exclude women. Like knowing about football means entry to some boys' club. Shows you are a lad. And girls who try to do football get laughed at. Called groupies and hangers-on.
  • The world stops functioning when there is a big event on like the world cup.
This list is not exhaustive. It covers the main ones though.

As you can see I have just cause to hate football. It is a loathsome game on all fronts. In fact I feel like giving up right now. Why should I bother with this ridiculous blog. Then again why should I let football get the better of me.

So that's it then. Onwards and upwards. "Issues" "parked".

Next post - how I'm going to learn to love football.

Friday, 9 March 2007

The Offside Rule

Now listen carefully. This is really important. If you don't get this you might as well give up now. It not that hard but people get worried about it. Its the offside rule.

You will probably find this easiest if you are sitting at a table. You will need some props. A sugar bowl (empty), vinegar bottle, salt and pepper pots, a bottle of ketchup and a bottle of brown sauce (glass or plastic). Oh and a malteser.

Now put the sugar bowl at the far end of the table with the bowl bit facing towards you. Put the vinegar bottle directly in front of it. Now put the salt and pepper pots in front of these two, say one on the left and one on the right. Put the ketchup in front of them and the brown sauce just in front of you.

Now Ketchup and Brown Sauce are attacking. Salt and Pepper are defending. Vinegar is the goalie. Brown Sauce kicks The Malteser forwards and Ketchup runs forward, past Salt and/or Pepper and gets The Malteser. Shoots. GOAL!

Same scenario except this time, Ketchup starts running before Brown Sauce kicks The Malteser. He runs past Salt/and or Pepper just before Brown Sauce kicks The Malteser. He gets The Malteser. Shoots. NO GOAL! Reason? The offside rule.

The offside rule says there must be two of the defending team between the opposition and the goal before the ball is kicked. Once it is kicked it is fine to run forwards. It is to stop goal hanging.

So - no Salt AND Pepper, no goal!

See its easy!

That's the offside rule.

And this rule, the offside rule, leads to the offside trap. Its a trick Salt and Pepper play on Ketchup and Brown Sauce. One or both of them run forwards just beforeThe Malteser is kicked by Brown Sauce, past Ketchup, thus putting Ketchup offside.

And that's the offside trap.

Next post I'll tell you about how much I hate football.

Thursday, 8 March 2007

Kick Off - Part 2

So where were we. Oh yes. Identifying all the things we know about football. And it is a lot I have to say. I have impressed myself with the amount I know and I am not even half way through the exercise yet. I'm starting to think this isn't going to be nearly as difficult as I first thought. POP as my lover would say.

So we've done the basic game. Now to consider some of the other important elements. At half time all the players suck on pieces of orange. Sometimes there are extra players in case someone gets injured or tired. They sit on a bench but run up and down the side line if they are going to get called on to warm up.

If the game is very important and ends in a draw then some extra time gets added onto the end. Also, when play stops because someone is injured or the referee has to tell them off for bad behaviour he stops his watch so that time gets added on the end too. If the game is really really important then there is a penalty shoot out.

Penalty shoot outs are quite something. I have watched a couple and even I have to admit they are exciting. High drama indeed. Every shot makes the difference. And the poor goalies. They have to play every shot. Such moments are the making of heroes and villains.

They decide who gets first kick of the ball by tossing a coin before the match. The punishment system for bad behaviour is that for minor things the referee waves a yellow card at you. For serious things or if you have already had a yellow card waved at you the referee waves a red card and you have to leave the pitch. Being sent off the pitch is shameful.

There is one more thing. Something that goes to the heart of part of what football is about I think.

Read my next post for the offside rule.

Wednesday, 7 March 2007

Kick Off - Part 1

OK then. Where shall we start? Best we start with a list of what we know already.

Football is a game played on a specially measured pitch with two upright posts and a crossbar, one at each end called goals. Sometimes there is a net at the back of these. There are 11 players in a team. One of these is a goal keeper who always wears gloves. And longer shorts I think. Some of the other players are defenders and some are attackers. I am not sure what the others do.

There is a referee. Everyone always says the referee is a bastard. The referee has a whistle which he uses to start and stop play. Play gets stopped quite a lot. It gets stopped because people commit fouls. Fouls are when you break the rules and when you behave in an ungentlemanly way. It also gets stopped when a player get injured. Players seem to get injured quite a lot in the football on the television. They get better very quickly too.

There are linesmen who have flags and run up and down the sides of the pitch. They are there to help the referee decide if there are fouls or the ball goes off the pitch. Sometimes they are bastards too.

The ball used is round. The aim of the game is to get the ball between the two posts at the opposite end of the pitch more times than your opponents and to stop them doing the same. If you kick the ball in your own goal it is called an own goal. Scoring an own goal is shameful.

If the ball is kicked off the pitch the ball goes to the team that did not kick it off. If it goes off to the side they have to throw the ball onto the pitch. This is the only time you are allowed to touch the ball with your hands unless you are the goal keeper. Otherwise it is called handball and is a foul.

If the ball goes off the back of the pitch and it is kicked off by the attacking team, it is a goal kick. That means the goal keeper kicks the ball back into play. If the ball is kicked off by the defending team then it becomes what is called a corner. The attacking team put the ball on a spot at the corner of the pitch closest to where the ball went off. Then they kick it into play and try to score a goal from it.

More next post