Suffer The Little Children

How awful!

Arsene Wenger has apparently been the victim of a chant from opposition supporters on regular occasions, calling him a paedophile.

Ironic really when it is in fact Chel$ea who stand convicted of child abuse.

Il N' Y A Rien De Place

So there we were in The Fountain.

Junior Goonier joined us with 3 of his mates just after kick off.

Between us we were 3 Liverpool fans, a dyed-in-the-wool Arsenal fan and a Leicester City fan with a slight lean towards the Arse.

Tight start with neither side able to get flowing and both making silly errors when passing.

The odd tense moment.

But then Arshaven was heading for goal when he was brought down.

Great. A penalty.

But no. The ref gave a goal kick.

Revenge was sweet though with that lovely strike from Arshaven just a few moments later.

Nothing sweet about the penalty awarded against Almunia though.

The own goal by the Arse that followed just made me feel sick.

And to then have a wonderful goal in the dying minutes disallowed as offside.

No wonder it was all too much for Wenger.

Sent in disgrace to the stands.

And then a scene that almost made the loss worth while.

Wenger with nowhere to sit, so sweetly defiant.

An iconic football moment I would say.

No Dummies

According to my friend Sandy, the Women's FA Cup final yesterday was a great game, with some really good football.

When I told my lover he said "Of course. They spring from the Arsenal camp" (I'm writing it down so he can't subsequently deny it).

I wonder if Uncle Arsene ever has anything to do with them?

Not at the moment I'm sure. Too much else on.

It's a bit of an upward struggle he and the boys face tonight. But if Arsene says they can do it - I believe him. He's no dummy!

And talking about dummies, lets all cross our fingers we don't get any diving and tantrums from Mr Ronaldo this time.

Talk about throwing your dummy out of the pram!

Pop Goes The Fergie

I'm meeting up with Junior Goonier and some of his mates in a little while.

I'm off to the pub with them to watch The Arse cane The ManUre.

I hope.

I must say I do have a sense of excitement and anticipation.

And I've loved the build up, with Wenger and Ferguson doing respectful humble on the surface, whilst busy playing headgames in the background.

That's how managerial combat should be undertaken.

Let's just hope the balloon goes up for Fergie tonight though eh!

Or better still - pop!

What If?

My lover and I have a game we like to play.

Well a number actually. But the one I am going to tell you about is a football game.

It's called "What might they have been".

So take for example football managers. What would they have been if they had not gone into football.

Here are some of our answers:

Arsene Wenger - Choreographer, a dance genius
Sir Alex - Pub Landlord, of a thriving local with an international reputation
Gary Megson - Travelling Salesman, struggling
Scolari - Coach Driver, the sort you all have a whip round to raise a collection for
Benitez - Pork Butcher, with a sharp eye for detail
Gareth Southgate - Supply Teacher, its the fear in his eyes
Roy Hodgson - Undertaker, with a soft heart
Big Sam - Pieman, of course

Why don't you play too?

Unequivocal

I spoke to my Gooner correspondent in the field today.

Georgie Junior.

Or Junior Goonier as I'm going to call him from now on.

(How embarrassing am I to have as a mother?).

I said to him;

"People are saying Arsene Wenger has lost the plot and it is time to go. What is your view on that?" (I chose not to mention that my lover has taken to calling the French genious 'Arsnic Wenger')

"People who say that", says Junior Goonier "People who say that need to go back to where we were when Wenger arrived. He has achieved so much with the club. We have had a difficult season with injuries. If we can get a place in the Champions League then we should, but if we don't then it is the UEFA cup and prepare for next season. We will come back."

Pretty unequivocal I would say.

And I trust his judgement.

Unequivocally.

Worried Men

There are a few worried men in the football world at the moment.

Obviously Steven Gerrard has his on-going court case on a charge of assault.

And now Robhinho has been arrested and bailed following an allegation of a serious sexual assault.

Meanwhile, Martin Allen has the look of a worried man. Not without cause.

And despite Wenger's bravado, I'm not convinced he isn't just a little bit twitchy.

But remember boys - it is just football after all.

Don't worry - be happy!

Tough Decisions

Sometimes when considering what to post about it is difficult to find a story that inspires my creative muse (how pretentious does that sound?!).

On other occasions, such as today, its like being in the shop at the Walkers Stadium.You know - looking at lots of wonderful things to buy (how do you choose between a Leicester City hat and a set of blue and white fluffy dice?). Spoilt for choice.

Should I take pleasure in Ronaldo's spectacular sending off? Celebrate the fact the Wenger has actually admitted to seeing that one of Van Persie's goals was offside?

Shall I marvel at the magic of the FA cup as Histon gave Leeds the biggest red face in their history (proof that good always triumphs over evil)? Or delight that the Foxes are through to the third round of the FA Cup?

I could recount the conversation of our supper guests on Saturday about parent's behaviour on the touchline in youth football. The one where we all expressed disgust at the bad conduct of some, but then proceeded to admit that when we watch our own children playing, the opposition cease to be their peers and become objects to be hacked down or anything else required to ensure you child's team wins.

I just can't decide.

Disneyland

Who would ever have thought that the world of football could be likened to Disneyland?

Well Joe Kinnear for a start.

So if Mickey Mouse is a metaphor for referee Martin Atkinson, what other characters might we identify?

Who, for example, might Sam Allardyce be?

Arsene Wenger?

Roy Keane?

Ian Dowie?

And who would I be?

Who else?

Reasons To Be Cheerful

There are some people with pretty cool names in football.

Like Arsene Wenger being called after the team he manages

On the other hand, there are definitely names you can wake up in the morning and feel really glad they're not yours.

Like Dean Windass (Hull City player)

Talking of things to be glad about, keeping your job as a manager seems to be something to aim for at the moment.

Ramos. Ternent. Boothroyd.

Question is will I be feeling glad at the end of tonight's Johnstone Paint Trophy against Rotherham?

The Boys Done Good

What a great night of football last night.

Wenger and the boys defeated their critics and have every right to celebrate after their fantastic display against Fenerbahce.

And Sir Alex is undoubtedly justified in enjoying a little wine following the ManUre's sparkling win (despite several dodgy refereeing decisions) - which would probably explain his very purple nose when he was interviewed last night.

Whilst we are on the subject of these two managers, it seems there is evidence that a degree of peace has broken out between them in recent months.

It's no surprise if there is mutual respect - they are after all both high achieving managers and in my view very gifted in their own individual ways. What they certainly have in common is the ability to remain successful despite the massive change that has gone on in football during their management careers.

Presumably one of the secrets of their success is an ability to adapt...........

Always The Bridesmaid Never The Bride

I know I shouldn't keep posting about Arsenal, being a Foxes fan and all that, but I do feel sorry for them.

And there is something just a bit unsportsman like about Ronaldo - brilliant as he is. I saw some nasty sneers and mocking looks on his face today.

You are very clever and very talented Ronaldo but beware for pride will have a fall.

Wenger may not have won anything this year. But I still rate him.

In the meantime, I would simply like to dedicate this to the great Arsene Wenger.

Better luck next year mate.

They Should Have Gone To Specsavers

Have you noticed how small print these days is getting smaller? And even less small print is getting smaller? In fact I am increasingly coming to the conclusion that lots of things in the world are getting harder to see.

What do you mean go and get your eyes tested Georgina? Are you suggesting it might have something to do with my age?

Well I can understand why you might suggest that. But you see I have good evidence for thinking its not just me.

We have been aware for some time that Mr Wenger and Mr Ferguson are struggling. Even Avram Grant has succumbed.

And we all know that there are a significant proportion of referees with sight deficiencies.

Now I'm a girl who believes in celebrating diversity and I am passionate about finding ways to enable people with disabilities. But if you have this much trouble at home, should you really be refereeing a football match?

It would be good to think there can be a place in sport for those with eyesight problems. Already we have linesmen who sometimes pick up the wrong flag on their way to the match. And the Blind World Cup Football tournament is proof that anything is possible.

They say that disability is made by those around us. If we all only had one arm we would structure our world around us to respond to that. But because the world is, in the main, geared up for so called 'normal' people (if such a thing exists) those who are 'different' have to somehow try to fit in.

So I have been giving some thought as to how we might 'enable' some of these football managers and referees to be able to operate better in the football world.

Maybe it is a colour issue. After all one symptom of this condition is the ability to see fouls by the other team but not your own. Presumably then if you managed a team in a different colour, the problem would be solved. For the managers at least.

Or perhaps players should be fitted with a tackleometer which is able to give instant feedback on how hard they have been hit and where. It could have the double advantage of deterring some of the divers as well, who obviously present a trip hazard to those less able to see what's in front of them.

In truth, I'm not sure how you decide if it's you or the rest of the world. After all, there is every chance that when this or this happens, you are blissfully oblivious.

I Ain't No Prawn Sandwich Fan

You'll all be relieved to know I am back.

It's like I always said. Give a Reading fan a blade of grass and they take a football pitch.

Thanks to those of you who have been leaving comments. I was beginning to think I was at an Arsenal match it was so quiet.

Anyway, one of these comments by a new reader, Colin Randall, himself a football blogger, challenged my fervent Foxes fanship (try saying that when you've had a few) on the basis that I show too much interest in and favour towards other teams.

It made me think about a conversation I had with my lover recently about the prawn sandwich brigade, some of whom (allegedly) change allegiance on a regular basis (only amongst the top four clubs of course).

The sort of think a member of the "prawn sandwich brigade" might say is:

"I think I'll support Chelsea next year. It will be nice to watch a team playing in a different colour for a change."

or

"I chose Manchester United because the parking at the ground is easier than at Liverpool"

As you know I am fairly new to football and have only been a Leicester City fan for about a year. You might wonder therefore how deep the roots of my loyalty really go. I have to confess to asking myself the same question with the threat of relegation looming so large.

I jokingly suggested that if they are relegated I would choose a different team. As I did so I had this really weird feeling. Like guilt. As if I had committed adultery or was at least contemplating it. I quickly realised that I could no more support another team than change sex. Even after such a short time and all the trials and tribulations, I'm a Foxes girl through and through.

But my journey has been about learning to love football and that has included learning to appreciate good football. So inevitably I have watched other teams play and bizarrely (although I don't believe for a minute I am unique in this) have found myself forming opinions and a level of allegiance on the scantiest of evidence.

None of these views would stand up to much scrutiny or analysis but here is my take on the Premiership teams:

Arsenal: I have a love for them because sometimes they play really really beautiful football. I don't like the persona Wenger presents in public but I do think he is a great and passionate manager. And of course my son loves them so I have an understandable affinity
Man U: How could you not love the football they play? I am much less keen on Fergie though even though I know he is a god in many ways.
Liverpool: I feel less pull to them although I love Crouchy
Chelsea: I can't love them Mourinholess
Newcastle: I'm sorry Mosher. I can't love a team who think KK is groovy and look like a packet if mint humbugs
Reading: I have to like them because my lover does. I do sort of - they have an underdog appeal don't they
Everton and Blackburn: Like 'em a bit. No idea why
Sunderland and Tottenham: Well there's Roy Keane and Ramos - yum!
Man City: I have to confess to finding Sven just a little bit sexy..........
Birmingham, Aston Villa and West Ham: No feelings either way
Portsmouth: Not sure really. Harry is a bit too much of a wide boy for my liking
Middlesbourgh and Wigan: Seem a bit dull
Fulham and Derby: I'm sorry. You can't love the unloveable.
Bolton: May they die a horrible death

Yet despite these strange affinities, I couldn't support any of them. Not like Leicester.

No - there is no doubt about it. Given the choice between a pie and a prawn sandwich I'll take the pie every time.

There's Nothing Like A Mother's Love

Happy Mother's Day!

They say, don't they, that no matter how ugly or awful someone is, their mother probably loves them. And in most cases I am sure that is true.

Despite the heartaches it is a real gift to be a mother. It is certainly one of the joys of my life.

It won't surprise you to know, therefore, that mothers are often an important feature in the lives of footballers.

For example, there is evidence to suggest that Arsene Wenger's mother is responsible for steering him towards the Gunners rather than any other team as a child. I mean look what she named him for goodness sake!

And even if they have not influenced them in a particular direction, footballer's mother's can sometimes provide us with an insight into what has inspired their offspring. Kevin Keegan will certainly be hoping Berbatov's mother's belief her son has Newcastle running through his heart will help him attract the Bulgarian player to the club in the summer.

And the theory that a love of football can be inherited seems to be proved by the fact that Frank Lampard's aunty is married to Harry Rednapp, and their son, Jamie, Frank's cousin, also has a career in the beautiful game.

Of course, the maternal influences have not all been good necessarily. There is a rumour, for instance, that Wayne Rooney's mother is responsible for his distinctive facial features because she fed him too many sprouts as a child. If that is the case, then maybe if I had put more pressure on my children to eat up their greens, one of them would now be a footballing god too. How we mothers let our children down!

And isn't it heartening to know that even one of the most famous football manager's in the world at the moment, Fabio Capello, is still the subject of his mum's worries, not least because she is concerned he may do so well that England triumph over Italy.

At the end of the day, there's nothing like a mother's love.

Vive Les Éléphants!

20th January sees the start of the African Cup of Nations tournament.

What has that got to do with us you might ask? Well try asking Arsene Wenger who expects to lose Toure (Ivory Coast) and Eboue (Ivory Coast) for at least four weeks to play there, plus any recovery time they might need. Or Avram Grant who stands to lose Drogba (Ivory Coast), Kalou (Ivory Coast), Obi (Nigeria) and Essien (Ghana) for the same period.

The tournament is currently held every two years and because of the number of African players now in Premiership teams has a significant impact upon English football.

The suggestion of those such as Wenger and Grant is that the tournament should be changed to the summer, possibly June time.

Its a tricky one. On the one hand most would agree that the English Premiership is the top football league in the world. On the other I can't help thinking why should Africa be the ones to change. Maybe it is the FA that should look at the scheduling over here.

Controversial of course! And unlikely to happen. But as a point of principle it would be good to see a somewhat less Eurocentric view of football.

Looking at past results, the host team for the tournament are most likely to win. Next year's host is Ghana who have won the trophy 4 times previously. Not surprising then that they are one of the favourites to win this time.

When you look at the quality of some of the players in the Ivory Coast team though they must be in with a chance. Amazing when you look at the size of the country compared to some of the others. If I was a betting woman they I would probably put my £1 each way on them.

You heard it here first.

Clash Of The Titans

Leicester play Colchester tomorrow - away.

But while those little Foxes are wending their way down to Essex, preparations will be underway for another battle. A conflict of epic proportions.

On the one side, fierce, attacking, energetic dynamism. On the other, the grace and beauty of one-touch football.

I am talking of course about the match between Manchester United and Arsenal.

On current form they are the two best teams in the country. They are neck-and-neck at the top of the Premiership, with only 3 goals separating them.

The two managers are as different from each other as their teams. And things are somewhat - er - "tense" between them.

Ferguson considers Wenger "aloof", not least because he once refused to have a post-match drink with him. He also referred to him as "a disgrace" for allegedly taking no action when Arsenal fans turned him into a walking little chef after a match. The police have even been involved in the vitriolic war of words, cautioning that the conflict could be replicated between the rival fans.

So what is that really all about? I mean OK they are professional rivals but by all accounts some of the conflict has been bitter and personal.

Perhaps there are some deep-rooted class issues. Ferguson with his Glaswegian, working-class background. Wenger the son of a Strasbourg restaurateur.

Maybe there is some complex, homo-erotic dynamic that each is trying to repress and deny, leading to outward rejection and distancing.

Or I suppose it is possible they simply don't like each other.

In any event I think we can expect a compelling match. So I shall be down at the local football pub with my lover. He'll be cheering for those little Red Devils. And I'll be shouting "Up the Arse!"