A Woman's Place ?

She's away tonight. Her lover is here, tasked with filling her slot !

On my way home (black skoda fabia 1.9tdi driven slowly) from work in Purgatory this evening, I chanced upon this pair discussing the thorny ishoo of Women in Football.

In particular, Hope Powell being subject of debate. Back in 2007 she was just who she was. Now, she's the coach of a successful footballing side.

Durham, led the debate by saying she should try her hand at Professional Management. Alvin Martin coming out with all the usual bullshit stereotypes about women in football. The blokes wouldn't accept it, she couldn't stand the stress....etc etc.

As you all know, I'm a fan of strong and capable women and Hope ticks the box for me mates.

I hope we see her doing something amazing soon. She couldn't do much worse than some of the present incumbents.

But then of course, she's a woman and it wouldn't work would it ?

Unless some of us change our attitudes perhaps.

Goodness, we're back to Purgatory again.

At half time, the reds are 2 nil down. Oh mercy me !

HL

Bingo!

As a sports presenter on our local community radio (Every other Saturday afternoon 3-5pm), I feel duty bound to keep an eye on our local football team "Forest Green Rovers" who inhabit a local hill and the Blue Square Premiership.

The club sponsors the station and we regularly play jingles encouraging people to go along to watch.

And give regular updates on the scores during the broadcasts.

It's been a tricky start to the season to say the least.

Failure to win any of the first 12 games.

Then this weekend - Bingo!

Record Breakers

How sad to see our record breaking reign at home tumble to Preston.

It sounds as if we had our chances but didn't take them.

Good to hear that we carried on trying until the end though so at least managed a consolation goal.

And even the mightiest have the occasional fall.

I hope NP has a bit more idea than Ancelotti about what went wrong though.

Otherwise how is he going to know how to fix it?

Fancy A Nibble?

Girls.

If I said to you that I have found a way to lick David Beckham all over, without any need to worry about whether Posh would object what would you say?

Well have some of this.

Goodness - I'm melting myself just at the thought.

The Mysterious Case Of The Missing Link

Where is football's missing link?

Here maybe?

Or here?

No - I know where the missing link is.

Or rather I know what link is missing.

Where it is, is a mystery.

It's so missing you may even have missed it even when it did briefly appear.

My lover sent me a link today.

But when I tried it, it said this.

I tried to Google the subject to see if I could find another way in.

And there it was - Key figure in Notts County takeover served two years for fraud ...

Except when I clicked on it, it said this.

So I can't explain this missing link.

I wonder what has happened.

It's a mystery.

Paradise On The Pitch

Ah mes amis.

I 'ave ze most manifique tale to tell.

A tale of warriors and 'eroes.

Ze brave Tahitian futballers in ze world cup.

C'est incroyable!

Vive les Tahitians!!

The Young And The Restless

Ooohh I do love a good football story.

One of the latest story lines in the soap opera that is the Football League revolves around Sol Campbell.

I have to confess I was surprised when he went to Notts County. It seemed a really odd move from where I was sitting but I just thought I was probably missing something.

Now it would seem that he was seduced in some way (not the first of Sven's conquests!) and has suddenly woken up.

To add to the intrigue, there is a rumour he may be returning to Spurs.

Which may of course upset one or two White Hart Lane fans.

'Arry has previously said he would 'ave him in a 'eartbeat were he not at Spurs.

But Tottenham need to strengthen their defence having seen them play against Chel$ea at the weekend.

So the temptation may become too great.

Tune in tomorrow at the same time to find out what happens in the next thrilling installment.

A Moment Of Peace Amongst The Shark Bites And Dog Fights

Interesting that the Guardian have done some research and discovered that there is some substance to the suggestions that the ManUre do get a little assistance when losing after all ......

Still if we hadn't had all that extra time we would not have had the entertainment and drama would we?

But lets take a step back for a few moments.

Football is not always about shark bites and dog fights.

Sometimes a few moments quiet reflection is what is required (run the slide show).

Toilet Tale

I would never be one to suggest that constipation is a good thing.

But a positive side effect of having occasionally eaten too many pies is the requirement to stay a little longer in the bathroom than perhaps one usually would.

Such delays enable one to spend some time perusing the copy of "1001 Football Moments" residing on top of the laundry basket.

What delight then at the weekend to reach 1923, the year the old Wembley (properly called The Empire Stadium, build in 300 days and costing £750,000) was opened.

Finished just 5 days beforehand, it hosted an FA Cup final between Boulton Wanderers and Wesh Ham United.

And saw around 200,000 people crammed into the stadium with a capacity of 127,000. The pitch had to be cleared before the game could start, and there is an iconic scene where PC George Scorey (presumably no pun intended), and his trust white steed, Billy, parted the crowds and managed to push them back as far as the touchline.

Apparently when the game finally started, 45 minutes late and in the presence of King George, players and ball regularly disapperard into the crowd. Boulton's second and winning goal was contraversial on the basis that West Ham alleged a Boulton fan had kicked the ball back into play in the run-up to the goal.

Anyway I hope you didn't mind me sharing that toilet moment with you.

I somehow feel it has brought us closer together.

What's The Time Mr Ref?

So where were you when the ManUre Man City derby was on?

I was not able to watch the match unfortunately, due to having other very important things to do.

Whilst others were no doubt sitting relaxed with their feet up, maybe sipping a lager and eliciting the odd cry of frustration or encouragement, I was in the shed with my lover.

Picture us with matching navy blue overalls, a Bosch chainsaw and a very large pile of wood to cut up.

Oh and safety gloves and goggles of course.

Don't be too sad for me though.

I did listen to the match whilst we worked.

And it means we won't run out of wood in the winter and have to go out to chop more when we are watching football warmed by our little wood burner.

Which is probably just as well if referees are going to start adding an arbitrary couple of extra minutes to injury time on a regular basis.

Or maybe that will only be for the ManUre when they are losing or drawing..............

You Wat, You Wat, You Wat You Wat You Wat!

OK. So maybe I was a little precipitous in the week about The Posh. I did say they were not to be underestimated though.

Today we play Watford.

Just above us in the table.

A team that has had it's successes in the past.

A place with the odd surprise.

Where the women are not to be messed with.

Although there is some dispute as to whether they are any good or not.

No doubt at 3pm we will see Wat they have got to offer.

Light and Bright

Light and bright is the order of today girls.

Do As I Say Not As I Do

So 1 0 up at half time.

Hope Liverpool manage to score again in the second half.

Otherwise St Stevie of Me may have to resort to this just to make sure victory is secured.

You know what they say.

Ready And Waiting

An interesting fixture for us tonight.

We play Peterborough, also newly promoted.

Who do seem to be struggling in this division to date.

Although not, I would suggest, a team to be underestimated.

We beat them 4 - 0 at home last season but they beat us 2 - 0 on the return visit.

We play them at home.

Where we remain unbeaten for over a year.

Cummon then you Posh.

We're ready!

It's The Passion

Football is a passionate game.

It's one of it's greatest charms.

I don't think anyone would dispute that analysis.

But where those feelings flare into aggression and violence, or the goading of players (including racist and homophobic chanting), that passion become problematic.

So whose responsibility is it to manage that tension?

The finger of accusation is clearly pointing at Adebayor after his antics this weekend.

One could ask to what extent any individual fans who reacted in an aggressive or violent manner were responsible for their own actions.

What would I have done in a similar situation?

Well I probably would not having been fighting to get on the pitch to have a go at my tormentor.

Not least because he would dwarf my 5ft 4in frame (1.64m for my European readers)!

But I just would not act in that way.

That's not to say that I would not be affected by those around me and the passion of the situation. I can imagine being drawn into the odd offensive gesture.

Which leads us back to the responsibility of individual players.

I earn considerably less than Premiership football players. But I am clear that there are certain expectations that I behave in a professional manner when at work. Whatever obstacles I may come across.

So I don't think it is unreasonable to require players to exhibit a similar level of restraint.

It seems there is still a way to go on this, however.

The Icing On The Cake

I've had a lovely weekend.

I had Friday afternoon off, spent taking a leisurely walk along the canal bank with my lover. Followed by a refreshing beer in The Golden Fleece, passing time with some local 'characters'.

I caught up with a few emails and other bits of paperwork yesterday morning so I feel more on top of things.

Then we did our radio show, after which Spurs v ManUre at the pub.

Last night of the Proms topped off with a helping of MOTD.

Today was spent in the company of my lover and his mum, who is very sweet and funny and lovely company, walking along Clevedon Pier and eating ice-cream my lover queued half an hour for.

And if that isn't enough of a chocolate cake of a weekend for you...........

My boys duffed up Ollie's lot. And I found my cap, lost for 2 weeks, with my beloved Foxes badge on it.

What's a chocolate cake without the icing?

That's Football

Is it just me or are the ManUre becoming increasingly brutal in their efforts not to allow their crown to slip?

It seems that the reduction in their 'pretty' skills since the loss of Ronaldo has resulted in an increase in the use of the likes of Scholes, Fletcher and Vidic to elbow, push and kick their way through the opposition.

And it has to be said it is pretty effective. Really sad to see Tottenham rattled sufficiently to lose their initial rhythm which, had they sustained it, could, in my humble opinion, have resulted in them steamrolling Fegie's lot.

But - as they say - that's football!

Dream On

I have an eye for an opportunity.

How does that work?

Well clearly, Capello wants to ensure his players are not distracted when he needs them to focus on the world cup.

So I'm thinking of offering my services as a chaperone.

All in the name of supporting the boys of course.

And if I were to find myself in such a position.

And if I was allocated to chaperone Posh and Becks.

Imagine how much fun I could have slapping his legs if he so much as cast a lustful look in her direction.

Flying The Flag

Some you win.

And some you lose.

I do feel a frisson of patriotic spirit starting to build inside me.

I remember when my lover and I first started 'stepping out' together.

One of our earliest conversations comprised my lover listening to a diatribe from me about the awfulness of tying England flags to cars.

He tried to tell me about the passion. What it means. How it feels.

But I was sure it wasn't for me.

And now I know. Deep down in my heart.

There is going to be a certain little gold Yaris driving around Gloucestershire, with the occasional foray down the M5, proudly displaying her flag of St George with 3 lions beating in her chest.

Welcome Home

I haven't had the best of days, although I won't bore you with the details.

But as I was driving home listening to Talk Sport I heard some news that lifted my spirits and made my own silly little troubles pale into insignificance.

Remember this story?

Well if you had not heard already, Michael Sheilds has been released today with a full royal pardon.

Even more touchingly, I got home to an email from his campaigns team sent to everyone who has sent messages of support during the last 4 and a half years.

I wish Micheal all the support and strength he will need to rebuild his life. I hope he can find a way to move on from the injustice he has suffered so that it does not continue to blight his life through unresolved feelings of anger.

Welcome home Michael.

Of Moral High Ground And Sleezy Low Life

Excuse me!!

Since when have Ken Bates and Leeds United been the keepers of football morality?

Those little angels of perfection.

When are we playing them in the League this season?

Oh yes - silly me.

They are still in League 1.

And we are in the Championship.

Still at least now at least we know that if they do ever get back in the Prem we can trust them to set a fine example eh!

I wouldn't hold your breath though.

It's not imminent.

A Whale Of A Presence

Do you know what ubiquitous means?

I remember the first time I came across the word.

It was in the novel "Moby Dick".

It is an adjective Melville uses to describe the great beast.

Anyway the word came into my head today.

First there was the story about David Beckham hinting he may return to the English league.

And then there were the comments about the forthcoming game against Croatia.

By David Beckham.

Who apparently is a believer.

Of course it is probably worth pointing out that whilst Sir GB and the big mammal may have ubiquity in common, only one of them looks good in underwear.

A Day In The Life Of A Wannabe

Ooooh I've had a day!

Playing guitars and tunes in a local pub.

Then coming down from the high of that to watch England.

Not a particularly memorable performance I would say.

They got the job done though.

Then on the local radio to perform 3 songs live.

Busking tomorrow.

It's all go in the world of a wannabe celebrity.

Chill Zone

It's Friday evening.

It's been a long week.

The Foxes have the weekend off.

It's time to sit back, chill and have a giggle.

Suffer The Little Children

How awful!

Arsene Wenger has apparently been the victim of a chant from opposition supporters on regular occasions, calling him a paedophile.

Ironic really when it is in fact Chel$ea who stand convicted of child abuse.

All Aboard For Platform Nine And Three Quarters

I'm not sure if I previously revealed this but I am a mad bonkers Harry Potter fan.

Indeed until I discovered that football offers rewards on a much greater scale, my passion for the series of books was as visible as my new besotted love of the beautiful game.

How brilliant then to have had a light bulb moment yesterday, when it suddenly occurred to me that there is a particular feature of football which bears a remarkable similarity to the world of witches and wizards.

In fact, if you didn't know it existed, you would say that a portal which only opens up between certain times and jams shut the moment the period is up.

Like a spell being broken.

But beware those who miss the transfer window and try to travel by a different route.

Just Deserts !

GB's away tonight.

This Weekend, the results of her work over the last few months will be realised and enjoyed by (hopefully) many. In the next few days, we're (GB and I) supposed to be playing John Prine songs here to a fairly pissed audience.

Last night saw us up the pub watching (dare I say it) Sky. Foxes were very good. They deserved more from the game. I also feel (having been to St James' Park on Holiday) that NUFC will now get better and better. It is to be hoped that Chris Hughton will be rewarded for his tenacity of spirit and genuine hard work by being given a serious job at the club. Even more so now after seeing the pityful Shearer and Dowie making love with one another in a corporate box on telly.

Today see us at the final stage of the summer transfer window. I've nothing much to report of serious consequence. I have observed, listening to the radio, however, there is a serious body of opinion who wishes for Joleon Lescott to fall flat on his ass at Citeh, somehow thinking he has done the dirty on poor old Everton.

Personally, I think Everton fans might be jumping up and down with their new signings. Good business I'd say and more reason to think they will challenge my own little club ever more seriously. It's no surprise Sir Alex rates David Moyes very highly.

Anyway, she'll be back tomorrow everybody. Hope all is well with you in your world and, if you have a moment to spare, have a look at this lot and their new song. The probably deserve to succeed too now.

Love HL

I always thought Roger Waters was up himself and Mosh, I've looked around for info on the Colaship, but nothing to report.